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Layaways

by Joshua Swann

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  • Cassette + Digital Album

    This cassette contains the official release of Layaways with bonus content and album artwork.
    These tape masters come signed by me, the artist and include a special thank you message.

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  • This is the big fella, the original master reel. Serial number 01, autographed and packaged in original Ampex box
    Only one of its kind.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Layaways via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 1 day
    edition of 1 
    Purchasable with gift card

      $200 AUD or more 

     

1.
We had a good time Somewhere round the start Its our last trial in fire Oh My companion star But don’t let it die Don’t let it slip past Into final darkness Into our future past Reading about the river’s not the same as fishing and it’s something that we never got to do If I could reach into the past then I could spend that time with you But all I have are bits and pieces of puzzle that resemble something of a distant memory And if it’s true that this is all I’ll ever have then you can rest assured I’ll keep it for eternity.
2.
Is there any way to get it? memory in my eye It just came crashing in Now I feel I want to die (Or be there) I can smell everything I can taste the air The memory now trying to get out Try to get out What i can’t get out Things I forgot about Wisdom id thrown out Connections that could bring me about And put me back where I was But it’s just too quick a look What am I supposed to do With broken words from a book? And why now when I’ve come to accept Annie’s never coming back The numb little world I cater to Where everything fits Is missing bits And I have come to notice this Middle ground world Its not it It’s not it
3.
The Door throws wide a clear blue lake I stand paralysed in its wake convincing myself that it’s fake With every step back I take haven’t been here in a long time Still Hearing your voice in place of mine Forgotten what it’s like to (feel) (Feeling again for the first time in so many years) Too afraid to allow myself to heal (Healing and yet I don't recognise anything here) I figured that this day would come (Come time to clear the slate, write a new program again) After All of the signs had come and gone (Gone are the days where I let myself get that "sucked in" The program’s become standalone (Alone in the darkness I think I can find a way) I Convince myself and the seed is sewn (Backward through time to a place I would like to stay)
4.
Shut up in my room I took down from the shelf my best wine Went stumbling backwards trip fell clipped the table behind. With a bump to to the head I went out for a while in the night Deep in a dream i was headed fast towards a blue light The final sum id begun working on to overcome the problem of time two parts of the equation lay to each side of the answer obscured by its shine Stepping up closer I feel my feet sink down before I can reach the answer in time Scrambling up from the muck I see the parts fall away down a well The closer I get I can make out the shape of a symbol in blue suspended in air Heart beating faster I reach out to grasp it and take it before it’s pulled into hell Bring it back home safe from the dream to complete the ARC lest I should wake from this spell Annie’s suspended somewhere in time But I feel she is close and she’s ringing her bell Clasping the sign all at once I can see the shape how elegant it was in the end Unaware how my body was stretching and bending down into darkness pulled by the well Down into Darkways and downways I went holding the answer in my arms I fell
5.
How much of it did I outrun though the void? See I never had a chance to look behind me. Tell me how bad do you wanna live? Are you willing to let it go? Are you busy clearing a path through all these windings? Displacement Remember what this place meant? A family album in the basement Smiling faces lit up by the casement But now you’re Torn between an ever widening gap Knowing you can never bring them back I don’t know if you can hear me Just want you to know that it will be alright Somehow you are near me My heart is letting in the light What am I doing? Shouldn’t I be where you are? Why does it feel like I can’t come close? Why does it feel so far? I can’t think of a reason Maybe it’s all just pride Maybe I can’t take failure Maybe I can’t decide Maybe what’s left is too much Maybe I’m scared to let go Maybe somehow I’ll realise Maybe somehow I already know
6.
The A.R.C 03:07
The softest times All enshrined Took place and precedence I’m my mind Of my kind Belonging to And so I went Memory I need you more Than anything Hey Harry Hey In time I will follow you.
7.
Malfunction 07:13
Analog Silicone Saw a log Thoughts of home All I can do See it now Reach back somehow Failing Falling Terminal Gravity well Silicone propels us backwards Against the pull inward Down inside I feel Somethings wrong Built it strong but somethings wrong Malfunction Dream awake All is fake Hallucinating now Spells our fate now It’s malfunctioned somehow Signal Won’t go Can’t escape Terminal Pulling Stretching We’re the test ape Thoughts of home
8.
Annie 03:06
[Good morning captain Your current location is earth Please remain seated until Atom regrouping is complete] Ok I’m Taking off my mask I’m tired of hide and seek Besides It’s getting dark fast Something tells me Something tells me You’re just behind that tree Annie? I want to go home Harry Come on let’s go home I can’t Don’t make me go searching for you Don’t leave me here alone I wont Why can’t you come with me? I can’t take this anymore Annie I Shhhh As I lay me down to die You’ll Wake up on the shore
9.
M.I.A 03:49
At first I heard a call Some kind of bird or skink I was without my crystal ball To sit alone and think Slowly now returning Small pieces of me They were never gone Only in hiding Water laps my feet I can feel the wet receiving and transmitting Strengthening the net Pathways reconnect Now I recollect Now I recollect Most All I did forget
10.
Layaways 03:13
There you lay My Layaway Is Safe To Say That youre tucked away In Darkways? Thought you got away With everything I paid But hey… How could I forget you? I remember! I’m comin Im comin Im comin to get you Come December Well I’m Comin Comin I’m comin to get you Come December For one time in my life Something feels so right I feel so warm inside I’ll take you in my stride Together With Arms open wide You know I’m on your side Besides how bout this weather Lying in wait Just round the bend It’s over I’m coming You’re it The end Wont you leave the porch light on Lying in wait Just round the bend It’s over I’m coming You’re it The end!
11.
A soul who cried out in darkness (Now we are all together We’re all here at last) A soul who followed the sound (Every single moment Future Present Past) Once found brought them family (We go on forever And ever we last) The two of them were bound (Everything is super now In the sun we bask) Hearts tried in fire (By the lake we picnic In rivers we raft) Blasting their convection zones away (Summer’s here forever Fishing lures cast) Now All that remains is a hole (Blue sky sunny weather Evening overcast) Pitch black in the light of day (All summer endeavours Forever) (We are all together What more could we ask?) Apple core Nothing more (Everything is super now By the sea we bask) Except a seed And An open door (Light and love and laughter Echo down the path) I’m the hope Im the permanent marker (Winds carry our voices We raise every mast) And I’ll be damned if I let you rub me out of existence (Embark the vessel Return to the past) You know I wont be going down without a fight and kicking (Leave this world forever and ever) See I’ve already filled the position. (Future Present Past)
12.
Homecoming 04:53
Hello darling I’m back Home with you again But my feet don’t touch the ground Not a “soul” Sweet family Pass me round this “living room” Tragic How tragic I’m my mind I’m in hell It was a senseless death It was a senseless death But when I realised the truth It was too late

about

Before you consider buying this album, consider first your local veterans who are in need this holiday season. Please stop, give your time to them and donate your money to them directly first and foremost.

vva.org/donate/
www.vvmf.org/topics/Australia/

Layaways is a fictional concept album which articulates a dark and at times hopeful expression of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Fragments of memories which are triggered by seemingly insignificant happenings. The soaring highs and deep dark lows that accompany.

This album is full of intense moments and at times swearing.

***It should be known that there are a handful of references to the Vietnam War. If you are sensitive to auditory depictions of violence, the sound of gunfire, bombs, radio communications, trip wires, helicopter or any other references to death, warfare, panic attacks or scientific experiments it is advised that you DO NOT listen to this album.***

This story is SCIENCE FICTION (bar some elements of sound bites contained.)

However the emotion here is real and raw.

Some themes contained shed light on feelings of DISPLACEMENT and ISOLATION from society and from family. There is much aggression.
It (abstractly) demonstrates long term effects of severe post traumatic stress disorder which many people can possibly relate to.

"Layaways" is the incredible fictional story of Harry who is forever torn between an ever-widening gap in his world and the past. By accident he's discovered a way to bridge the two.

This is Harry's nightmare and yet it's a place he-himself haunts eternally.

credits

released October 31, 2023

To those who have fought and died for our freedom and to those who suffer from post traumatic stress disorder as a result of war, I thank you and welcome you home.

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